hi. i'm twenty-eight. and i just moved out of my parents house. FOR GOOD. [insert deep exhale] this decision was one that was long coming, obviously, but it all happened so fast. this year has been one of so many changes already. i feel like everything i have/am experiencing should have already happened many years ago. but the beauty is that it is all in God's timing. every day i remind myself that God's got me. "i am my beloveds and He is mine." He looks down and says "that is my child. my beautiful daughter. i delight in her." and i am so unworthy. excuse me while i take a few minutes to soak it all in...again.
::intermission::
2013 brought on:
a boyfriend. he's simply wonderful. and constantly pushes me towards knowing Jesus better. he prays for me. he understands me. but...i have to be real with him. i need to be transparent and let my "emotions" out. this has been a rough thing for me, honestly. i am one that holds things in. i just deal with them. suck it up and move on. but i have been working on it. not only with him, but with my friends, as well. and as hard as it has been so far, it has been so worth it. that journey alone has been draining.
an accountability group. initially it was for our personal health goals. but it has turned into something far more than i could have ever thought it would. these women are Godly women who have pushed me. encouraged me. inspired me. prayed for me. challenged me. they have done so much and i thank God daily for them. once again, i have been pushed to open up more. and it has been nothing short of a blessing.
moving out. i have "grown up" as society would say. but i've always been one to go against the grain. i never took advantage of my parents. or expected them to pay for my bills. or feed me. i was living with them, yes. but i was supporting myself. and society's labels can go somewhere. i cried the second night i was out. (figures) but it was more of a release. i forced myself to look at my friends and their lives. people as a whole. this is what you do. this is how you move forward. i put my big girl panties on. and now i have more time to myself. i love being around my family with everything in me. but now i have time to be still. and i love that fact. i feel myself drawing nearer to my Jesus. i am excited more than anything. i am growing.
so i say hello to future nights of friends and fellowship. wine and tears. food and laughs. and the love of my sweet, sweet Jesus never leaving. cheers to rebirth.
